Wednesday, 01 October 2008
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Concerns of an active dater
I'm 19, and I'm in college. I feel as if I am fairly attractive, and can dress pretty well. I'm fairly broadminded, quite the romantic, act a fool sometimes, but all in good fun. After this, there's still one problem -- I feel as if I don't attract enough female attention. Or I do, and get friend zoned. I've pondered this for quite some time, and I'm still inconclusive about it. How do I step beyond the friend zone? Is it in my language? or the way I look, or act? Please help...
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Comments (6)
I dunno, maybe you need to show a little more interest? It's possible that girls think they might not have a chance with you. Do you ever ask them out? Is that when they say they think of you as more of a friend? Just curious... I'd like to know a little more about your situation so I can give you a better opinion... :)
@That_Girl_74 - Yes, I do ask them out... Usually I ask them things such as "what's up for the weekend... want to hang out?" or something along those lines. Gah, it's frustrating..
What type of relationship are you looking for?
If you're seeking a casual fling kind of relationship... that's one thing... but if you're actually seeking a decent, committed, more serious type of relationship with a good girl, then I suggest getting to know these girls better first. What I mean is, being in the friend zone is not necessarily a bad thing. The BEST relationships come from a solid friendship. Sure, it takes time and effort, and it requires you not to hit on every other girl that you might meet, but once you get to know someone deeply and wind up really falling for them... well, my friend, that is something called LOVE. And it's the best!
Heehee. Otherwise, just date around. There's nothing wrong with it--it's just that different people prefer different type of relationships. Also expand your horizons and meet DIFFERENT kinds of people. For instance, my friends are always complaining about meeting sleazy guys/girls but they're always going to sleazy bars/clubs to meet potential mates!
Good luck! Oh, and if you meet a nice girl, ask her if she has an available brother for me ;)
Don't let them confide in you. They start telling you their secrets or talking about other guys to you... You've been friend zoned. If you're not someone they can confide in, you're less likely to be friend zoned. Granted, this should end once you're actually dating a girl. Then she needs to be able to confide in you, haha. And flirt a fair a lot, but ONLY with girls that you actually are interested in and never flirt with multiple girls at the same time. If they see you flirting with other girls too, they'll think you just flirt with everybody and that's just the way you are, so your'e not actually interested and you're just friends... Or they'll think you're a not very smooth player... Haha.
@hopelessromantic - I think you might have something there... Perhaps my "flirting game" is weak. Perhaps I don't know how to flirt at all.. ;_;
I agree with hopelessromantic here. That's a good thing to look at as well.
Just try not too take it too personally. Things will come along :)